Drivers of Short Term Contention

Gayle and Chloe have continued their friendship from the previous summer but the two have few close friendships in common. As such, Chloe continues to find herself at odds with Gayle’s more possessive friends like Britney. Recently, a girl named Natalie seemed to be the one wanting to put a wedge between Chloe and Gayle.

At the end of a Wednesday half-day, Chloe wanted to get a smoothie after school and was soliciting friends to see who might go there as well. As the school day ended, Chloe saw Gayle and Natalie headed to the parking lot. “We’ll meet you there,” Natalie said. “My mom is picking us up and taking us there.”

So Chloe walked to the smoothie place. She waited. And she waited. Finally, Chloe called Gayle. Gayle answered and then the phone hung up quickly. Chloe didn’t like the implications so she walked home. At home Chloe sent a text message to Gayle asking what happened. Gayle blamed it on Natalie’s mother but didn’t take any responsibility for not letting Chloe know about her change of plans.

We can only conjecture what happened exactly. Did Gayle hang up on Chloe? Or did Natalie grab Gayle’s phone and cut her off? Or did Natalie’s mother insist on no phone calls? We don’t know. I had a hard time believing Gayle would deliberately betray Chloe but I could likewise see Gayle caving to someone else’s antics. I could also imagine Gayle having too much pride to admit she had wronged Chloe in any way without parental intervention, and Chloe certainly did not want to risk any fallout from getting Gayle’s parents involved in some kind of reconciliation.

At home, Chloe was deeply unhappy about “getting ditched” that day. She openly wondered if she would ever be friends with Gayle after what happened. When a boy told Chloe that he saw Gayle and Natalie getting lunch at the Chinese take-out across the street that same day, Chloe sent another text to Gayle confronting her. But Gayle did not want to lose face and denied anything other than going home with Natalie’s mother.

But it was only a little more than a week later that Gayle and Chloe were talking amicably again. Gayle wanted Chloe to go to an evening event with her on Friday. And from the event, Chloe sent us a text message asking if she could sleep over at Gayle’s house.

In the end, I would conclude Natalie was possessive of Gayle and did not want Chloe interfering. As a tween Gayle has not learned to manage her friends’ treatment of one another. But left on her own, Chloe is Gayle’s choice to bring on a family vacation, a Friday evening event or a weekend sleepover. As long as Chloe can tolerate Gayle’s occasional shortcomings, everything should be fine between them. Eventually, Gayle will outgrow these shortcomings and Chloe will no longer need to worry.